I am currently mentoring an individual who has been playing Dungeons & Dragons for about ten years — 5th edition, exclusively — but is now branching out into the new role of Dungeon Master. I have an ulterior motive for helping them.
I’ve been running the D&D program through my local public library since fall of 2023. It started out as a place I could rent to run private games with individuals (adults) that I invited. Eventually it got popular and the library staff noticed how much fun we had, so we agreed to open the game to the public and the library would promote the games as part of their regular community programs.
It became clear that the tweens and teens expressed much more interest than the adults (to be fair, the adults had the desire but it’s harder for them to manage their schedules to play on a regular basis). So, after consulting with the library staff, I changed my group to be solely focused on the 11-17 year old age bracket.
This teens format has been a huge success, with a waiting list of players eager to rotate in when a seat opens up.
Because of this demand, the library and I have been looking to add a second Dungeon Master so that we could form an additional group to play on a different schedule.
As anyone who has tried to form a D&D group knows, getting a good DM is even harder than finding a group of players that can show up on a regular basis.
We eventually found someone who originally wanted to sign up as a player, but after feeling inspired, they decided to learn how to run the game from behind the screen instead.
After that historical background, I am now working with this budding Dungeon Master who is soaking up everything I can share about my experience as a DM.
We’re complicating matters by making this a dual-DM, shared-world sandbox. So not only is this individual having to learn how to be a DM, we’re also throwing in a merchant’s wagon-load of complexity by coordinating our shared world between us.
During this mentoring process, I have spent a lot of time and thought trying to define what it means to be a good DM. What lessons have I learned through my own experience as a DM, as well as from being a player with someone else running the game?
I have come to two macro-level realizations about what makes a good DM.
First, being a Dungeon Master is actually two very different roles within the same title.
You must prepare well, and you must run the game well. These are entirely different skills and can reveal entirely different talents and preferences within the individual DM.
Some DMs excel at preparation. They are master world builders and reveal a tremendous amount of creativity that would rival Tolkien in scale and depth.
Some DMs suck at this. They either hate the process, preferring to wing it table-side, or they have zero talent or creativity. Most of these individuals tend to weed themselves out of that role pretty quickly, either because they can’t get any players to show up to their games a second time, or they bow out voluntarily because it’s such an unpleasant experience for them.
Some DMs excel at running the game. They have a moderate ability to prepare the adventures, either by doing it the old fashioned way — stealing or bastardizing other people’s works — or they just have an innate talent at playing all the right chords based on what the rest of the band is doing on the fly.
In my experience, between the two skill sets, being able to run the game effectively and enjoyably is most important. Regardless of your source material, if you can keep your players entertained at the table, they’ll keep coming back for more. The preparation side is easier to fudge because it’s more of a skill (which can be trained up) than a talent.
The second point I learned, and this is perhaps the most important, is that how “a good Dungeon Master” is defined is largely subjective. As long as you have the basics of a moderate ability at prep and a foundational knowledge of the game’s rules and mechanics, the rest is a matter of style.
Just like players, some of whom portray their characters with interesting voices and flair while others simply say, “My fighter hits the orc with her sword,” a DM’s style should be uniquely their own.
In my conversations with the apprentice DM, I find much of my advice has been one variation or another of, “This is what I have found works for me, but ultimately you should experiment and figure out what works best for you and your players.”
The universal advice to all Dungeon Masters seems to be, “Know your players and do what serves the table — both them and you — so that all of you have the most enjoyable time possible.”
Notice how I include the DM in that advice. To the budding DM, I say: know yourself. Understand your strengths and emphasize them, and find ways to overcome or work around your weaknesses — or ignore them altogether if they’re not impactful or important to the game.
No player is perfect or 100% complete. No DM is perfect, either. If you lack prep skills or the desire to prep, find a way to get decent source material that doesn’t eat at your soul in the process. If you find it difficult to run the game, give it some time. Much of what makes running the game well comes with experience. Meanwhile, ask other DMs for specific advice on the parts that are the biggest challenge (if the entire thing continues to be a struggle, be honest enough with yourself to accept that being a player instead of a DM — or finding another hobby entirely — might be the best choice).
Becoming a Dungeon Master is a big undertaking. I’ve written before that it is a labor of love, but I add the clarification that the love must come first or the experience will be nothing but labor.
But, and this is perhaps my biggest point of this entire article, it is crucial to remember that the definition of a good Dungeon Master is subjective and fluid. Some players may not like your style but others will stick with you until the all the dragons are slain and the liches are nothing but ink in a tome of history.
Play to your strengths, improve or circumvent your weaknesses, be willing to grow through advice from others and the lessons within your own experiences, and above all, be your honest self.
